Sunday, May 18, 2008

Coincidence?

On Mother's Day my MIL gave me a prayer book for mother's saying "it doesn't mean anything, there are prayers in there for your husband and marriage." Since I had just found out three days before that I am pregnant, it was just a little ironic.

I hope that people are not reading anything into little things I'm doing. For instance, we sat down to eat lunch and after my first bite of food, I immediately felt unable to eat anything on my plate. So I spent some time taking a few drinks of tea and moving the food around on my plate and slowly eating my salad. Josh kindly started sneaking food from my plate to help me out. Josh's younger sister asked me if I was ok at one point when I stopped pretending and was calming my stomach.

When we first arrived Josh was telling his parents all about the new car we just got. After that subject was exhausted, his mom asked (in what I thought was an expectant tone) "what else is new?" but Josh didn't seem to think anything of it. Then again before we left, his mom asked me how I've been feeling, to which I replied that "I have been tired, tired of classes." She went with it. I don't know if they suspect, or if I'm just looking for them to suspect when they don't have a clue.

It makes me feel weird that I have this big news that we are so excited about that we're not telling anyone! I feel like I'm lying to them.

It hasn't been that big of a deal except that this past week I've had a difficult time with nausea and fatigue. Even though we decided to wait until I see the doctor before telling everyone, I feel badly about making excuses to deceive people. I guess we'll just have to see how things progress, and take it from there.

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